Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Nursing You To Health

January 4, 2011
Tonight I took a breastfeeding class. I am not sure if you will be able to nurse when you are born, but I would sure hope so. I know that my breastmilk is perfectly designed for your body. Isn't that amazing? For nine whole months, a baby grows inside of its momma. During that nine months, my body gets to know you so well that it designs the perfect milk. Whatever your little body needs, my body will produce. Even when you're outside of me, our bodies are so in tune that my milk will change to fit your needs. I just think that is such a beautiful part of God's creation. I want you to have my milk. I know that even if you can't suckle, I want you to be given my milk through a feeding tube. I know it will help you. If there is any medicine that is perfectly designed for you, it is the milk that we produced together.
So I went to the class. It was very informative, but I still had so many questions. Our adventure in feeding will be much different than how she was teaching. I stayed after class to talk with the lactation consultant. I told her my feelings about breastmilk. MY breastmilk. I told her your condition and I told her exactly my wishes when you get here. I am afraid that the doctors and nurses won't allow me to give you my milk. I'm so afraid they will just do what they always do with sick babies. Maybe I'm being naive about the whole topic, but its what I want to try.
As I talked to her, tears welled up in her eyes. She was speechless to hear me speak of you. You are such a little missionary, Charles Patrick. You touch everyone's heart so deeply, and you don't even have a voice. I will be your voice, little boy. I am your mommy and I will take care of your needs. When I say she was speechless, she was truly speechless. She told me that your story is so touching and she couldn't agree with me more. She hopes she's on duty when you are born. I hope so too.


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